Love and Logic always suggests leading with empathy when your child is angry with you, or misbehaving, or even just complaining about life. You don't have to say much more than a sincerely empathetic, "I know."
"You are the meanest parent in the world" - "I know."
"I want you to buy that for me." - "I know."
" I never get to do anything." - "I know."
"I hate it when you say I know!" - "I know."
My friend Irina just sent me an e-mail about this magic phrase.
"Hi Jill, I was thinking about you yesterday. Katrina and I went shopping. She wanted something so I said "I know" only 3 times. Then Katrina asked: Mom, why it (I know) always has to work. I said because Mr. H's wife said it would and she is very smart. Katrina did conform- it does work. Thanks for all good tricks. Irina."
I have taken all my best parenting skills from Love and Logic. By the way, If you are in the Belleville, Illinois area, a new Becoming a Love and Logic Parent class starts Sunday, February 15, 5:30-7:30 PM at ZionLutheran Church, 1810 McClintock Ave., Belleville, IL 62221, 618-233-2299. There is great Children's programming available at the same time. The class is $50 a couple or $35 per individual but the first class is always free so you can try it our before you decide to take it! (Financial Assistance is alos available.)